The itsy betsy spider is cool as heck!

I’m going to try to tie two blogs in together Hurricane Thomas and the coolest spider ever.

Looks like a fly doesn't it!

Joyce left yesterday, two days earlier than planned.  It was a surprise to everyone because she changed her flight in the middle of the night.  As it turns out all flights for Friday (her original departure date) were canceled.

On her last day here I introduced her to my friend Betsy the fly-butt spider.  I first met Betsy as I was walking from my room to the convent and was like “holy Fly-Butt Spider Batman.”  She was munching on an unsuspecting fly that had thought her yellow butt was just too much to resist!

I like to think that I’ve found a new breed of spider so I studied her.  She tends to sit in the middle of her web waiting for unknowing male flies searching for a mate.  Then BAM gotcha.  Side note: we took IMMENSE pleasure in feeding her a few mosquitoes.  She may move awkward because of her over sized butt-weapon. 

I backhandedly mentioned that I was worried about my Betsy spider getting washed out the drain during Hurricane Thomas.  There was a momentary thought of Betsy sitting safely in my room within a glass jar, but I don’t like spiders that much… 

Then Joyce slapped me and said, “Eric there are 1.3 million Haitians who need a freaking safe place to stay and you are worried about a spider?”

Somewhat off guard I replied, “Well I don’t have a big enough jar for the Haitians…”

Even though it was light hearted it got me thinking about the Haitians and their insufficient tents.  In Haiti there are 1.3 million people in tents, 15% of the population.  Imagine if one day 1 of every 7 Americans were living in tents.  Go find 6 other people and draw straws…

A few weeks ago I went into a tent city.  Families of 8 or more can occupy a single tent.  The tents are packed so close together that it’s impossible to walk between them.  Some tents have beds inside but most don’t, and rain means that you’ve got to stand up or sleep in mud.

Imagine camping for 6 months, without any place else to go.  Camping with your kids, washing your clothes by hand, no running water, and the worst part, it’s hurricane season.  Honestly, I’m living like a king compared to these people.  Every time I get frustrated when the water is off for a day or two I just go for a walk.

It makes me wish I could had a 1.3 million person glass jar right now…

Betsy Climbing toward a mosquito.

Today I sit and watch not knowing where to help.  I continue to work on my work which has “long term” benefits.  The one solace I have is the last verse, “the itsy climbed up the spout again.” 

Keep climbing Haiti.

Alright so that’s where I should leave off for this blog but I’ve decided to keep a farewell promise to Joyce.  In lue of an Ode, she requested that I post part of our conversation about Betsy.

Joyce, hard at work or hardly working?

Joyce and I were sitting around the table talking about the dangers of genetic engineering in combination with the marvel of fly-butt spiders.  What could (and would) humans do with such a thing?  I mean it’s dangerous enough that we have lions, and tigers, and bears, but what if man made the deadliest weapon of all? 

GIANT Human-Butt Spiders!

Can you imagine the horror?  Of course they would be created first by the US for military applications in dessert warfare (to be followed shortly by China, Russia, India and strangely Cuba??).  Of COURSE proper safety protocols would be enforced so as to “effectively” neuter them… But we’ve all see Jurassic Park, we know how this ends! 

The spiders reproduce and become man’s deadliest enemy.  Luring unsuspecting males to their webs with their seductively mermaid like hind quarters!  Inter breeding with the Chinese, Russian, Indian, and Cubian Spiders creates multiple species:

• ·         The “maiden in distress”-butt spider,
• ·         The “I’m locked out of my car”-butt spider,
• ·         The “old lady trying to cross the road”-butt spider, and
• ·         The “little girl who’s lost her mom”-butt spider!

Betsy in "Come to me" mode.

 I don’t understand people who are afraid of zombies when this could actually happen!

Be careful who you vote for because they could secretly want to produce a breed of genetically engineered super smart man-butt spiders.

Now that’s scary!

Ode to Monica

So the other volunteer who came to Haiti with me left this morning. It was a sad and silent car ride. There wasn’t a whole lot to say after, “I know it’s for the best but I’m still going to miss you.”

Pic I took for Monica where we used to pray.

I met Monica at VIDES Orientation. I knew then we’d be great friends. First cuz she’s a giant goof ball. Second, cuz she can be bossy when it comes to health (I got dehydrated at orientation and she force-fed me water instead of letting me help clean up!) Third, she’s a solid source of spiritual advice outside of my family.

Before I arrived, I was debating whether or not I wanted to come to Haiti. I think I’ve mentioned this before. One of the many reasons I actually got on that airplane was Monica. I knew she’d need me to be there for her and I also knew I needed another volunteer to help me get acclimated.

In Haiti we became great friends. I’ve learned to look to her for a lot of my growth when it comes to God. Now I’m going to do something new, it isn’t my style to preach but I’m going to let you all know a little more about my faith...

I’ve never been a very “Catholic” person, as many of you know. Most of you don’t know that I’ve always had faith that there is a God but I’ve never defined much more than that. You don’t know because I don’t usually tell people. It’s very personal to me.

Monica cutting her birthday cake.

Well Monica helped expose me to what it actually means to be Catholic. Monica got me to start praying the Rosary, going to Daily Mass, appreciating the act of fasting, praying more and reading the Bible. Yet the Rosary was the cornerstone of our friendship.

For the first time in my life, praying the Rosary wasn’t a huge pain in the butt. It was actually kind of fun. We would use it as a way to hang out and warm up for some deep philosophical and theological discussions. These discussions allowed us to get to know ourselves and each other much better.

But the thing we did the MOST was talk about our significant others. I’d tell her about Shannon and she would tell me about Jared. We were together in Port-au-Prince for about 2 weeks before I went to Cap Haitian and about 3-4 weeks after I returned.

This morning she went back to the US because she’s been sick for 12 days.

Dear Monica,

I’m sad to see you go.

You’re friendship has meant so much to me.

Yet it’s time for you to know.

While sick, you can’t fight the Haitian Sea.

We will all miss you.

This is a poem of reminiscence.

Had you not been here.

I wouldn’t have talked about my poo

Would’ve missed your presence.

Had you not been near.

I’ll miss the times when we would talk

About all the things we found out of place

Mustering up the courage to go for a walk

Observing things that jump out at your face:

Like little boys peeing in the street;

Tents that fit a family of ten;

Wild dogs that want to bite.

Even when I felt like I was beat

You reminded me of the sorrows of other men

Whose burdens aren’t nearly as light.

So today I say goodbye.

Adios is always difficult,

With just one tear in my eye.

We both become a little more adult.

I promise to continue to fight:

Staying here I’ll to continue to see,

That which an earthquake does sow

Pray for me that I might

Have strength enough to be

The man God wants others to know.

Oreviour Monica

Eric

Biffy, Me, And Monica. Hang in there Monica!