Sunday, May 22, 2011
I'm sorry to anyone who actually read this thing and paid attention to what I was doing. I kinda dropped the ball. Well not kinda, I did. Leaving Haiti was a VERY hard decision for me to make, which took me months to come to grips with. It wasn't until I landed in Bolivia that I finally realized I'd made the right decision.
It was the kind of thing that felt selfish and there are nights, like tonight, that I lose sleep over it. In the end leaving Haiti turned out for the best. I've found a program that has helped me develop on a new level. I no longer feel like I'm in the same rut of personal growth.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not done with Haiti. I have a profound love for those people. I will NEVER forget any of them, but I also can't be there right now. My Haitian home was as much a prison as it was sanctuary. Gorgeous in it's splendor and amenities, yet very much separate from those people I wanted to help most.
Another down side was my workload, in Haiti I had to come up with my own work to do. I was forced to keep myself busy and in response I ended up wasting a lot of time surfing the web. I not only felt useless, but guilty I wasn't helping the people around me who were in need.
What I learned from Haiti: just because you can't help everyone doesn't mean you can't help MORE. In Haiti I felt that I reached out to a select group of people. Here in Bolivia, I'm part of a growing community. A group of people who have a goal, to change lives.
Right now that community consists of three awesome girls who have become like sisters to me: Carmen, Susan, and Michelle. Carmen is like my twin: krass, rash, and outgoing. She is bilingual in Spanish and English and is one of the few people I consider similar to Veronica.
Susan is like the younger sister who trips and is a little clumsy, however, she is ultimately the most patient person in the world. She reminds me of Tony (a friend from college) in the fact that she never ever gets mad and dances goofy as heck.
Michelle is like the mother/older sister down here. She takes care of us all and at the same time has the patience of a saint. I can't believe all that she is going through and she just offers it up to God. I have the utmost respect for her even if we have butted heads on occasion.
These girls have already taught me soo much and I don't know what I'd do without each one of them. I'll try to keep you updated on our adventures because every day is something new. I mean so far I've been entered into a first grade class, had an experience with cow pies, and physically done something to a student no teacher here would do... And they beat the kids!!!
I hope you are all excited to hear a few stories cuz you know I like to tell em.